How to Start and End Confession: A Priest’s Tips on Improving Your Practice of Reconciliation

It’s helpful to know how to start and end any activity. This foreknowledge helps manage any stress or anxiety around the upcoming event, especially when it comes to the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Knowing how to start and end is important for making a successful and holy confession as well as one that considers the others in the line behind you.

Though we will not go through the steps involved in one’s examination of conscience, it remains the first, necessary step before entering the confessional. This essay pertains to that which takes place inside the confessional. Here are the concrete practical steps involved:

Wait Patiently

Be patient in simply waiting for your turn to enter the confessional. Patience is a universal virtue that we need in all times and places, and even (and especially) in church, waiting for our turn on the confessional line.

Close the Door

This might seem obvious, but it is very often neglected, so I must state that you close the door upon entering the confessional. If not done, there is the chance that the penitents in line behind you might overhear what is said in the confessional, and nobody wants his or her sins to become public!

Getting Started

There is a traditional method for initiating the Sacrament of Confession. The penitent is the first to address the priest, saying “Bless me Father for I have sinned. My last confession was [amount of days, weeks, months, or years since the last confession]. These are my sins . . .” Stating the amount of time passed since one’s last confession is necessary so that the priest, chosen by God to be the spiritual physician, can better understand the penitent. Saying “one month” is very different from, say, “twenty-five years”!

Speak Clearly

The penitent ought to speak clearly to the priest, who represents Christ, to ensure that he can hear all that is said.

Ending

The penitent may end his confession by saying to the priest:  “Father, I humbly beg pardon for all these sins and sins of the past that I may not be aware of. I beg for pardon, penance, and absolution.” An excellent way for a penitent to conclude the Sacrament of Confession!

Act of Contrition

Now would be the time to recite the Act of Contrition. If by chance you do not have the Act of Contrition memorized, then usually you can find one in the confessional, either on the wall or on a card. Some simply have it ready electronically, ready to recite. The Act of Contrition should be prayed with great fervor and intention to do all in one’s power to avoid sin!

Absolution

Now it is the priest’s turn to intervene; this happens through the words of absolution.  These are among the most consoling words a person can hear. They serve as a soothing balm and peaceful anointing of the tired and weary soul . . . “And I absolve you of your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.”

Sign of the Cross

Even though this is not obligatory, many penitents will make the sign of the cross upon hearing the words of absolution, most specifically when the name of the Trinity is being pronounced.

Forgiveness

The priest can conclude with these consoling words of truth and mercy: “Your sins have been forgiven. Go in peace!”

Departure

Upon leaving, arise gently from the confessional. This time, instead of closing the door, leave it open so that the next penitent can enter easily.

Knowing how to start and end when making a good confession, while not the most important aspect of the sacrament, does add to the beauty and perfection of its reception. Furthermore, from the vantage point of the priest, the penitent that is capable of following the simple but important procedure makes it much easier for the priest in his pursuit of helping the penitent experience the infinite love and mercy of Jesus, our Divine Physician. In the words of the Psalmist, “Lord, give success to the work of our hands; give success to the work of our hands.”

Photo by Steffen Lemmerzahl on Unsplash