‘Una caro: In praise of monogamy’: A brief guide for busy readers
On Tuesday, the Vatican’s doctrinal office released a 22,000-word document that could arguably be summed up in just three: Monogamy is good.
The Italian text, Una caro: Elogio della monogamia (“One flesh: In praise of monogamy”), was presented Nov. 25 by the Dicastery for the Doctrine of the Faith.
The DDF has announced no specific release date for the English edition. But an official translation will likely appear in the coming days or weeks.
If you lack the time or inclination to read the full document, but you want to know what it says, The Pillar has a concise guide for busy readers:
What’s the background?
Why is the Vatican doctrinal office issuing a document in 2025 reaffirming perennial Christian teaching about matrimony?
In short, because it fears that monogamy is being eclipsed worldwide. In response, it wants to reframe the concept so it’s understood not merely as a prohibition on extramarital relations but as a prophetic witness to God’s faithful love in a fractured world.
The note observes that “various public forms of non-monogamous unions — sometimes called ‘polyamory’ — are growing in the West.” The weakening commitment to monogamy also affects the Catholic Church. In France, the number of Catholic marriages fell from 102,024 in 2003 to 41,402 in 2023. A similarly sharp downward trend is evident in most Western countries.
The note is inspired not only by Western social changes, but also by a debate among bishops in Africa and on other continents about how the Church should respond to the pastoral challenge of polygamy.
The Symposium of Episcopal Conferences of Africa and Madagascar is currently preparing a report for the Synod of Bishops on the topic. In a November update, SECAM’s president Cardinal Fridolin Ambongo said the DDF had offered “encouraging feedback” on a draft text and highlighted “specific considerations to be addressed.”
The close cooperation between the doctrinal dicastery and African bishops is notable given recent ecclesiastical history. In 2023, African Church leaders were blindsided by the publication of the DDF’s declaration Fiducia supplicans, which endorsed the blessing of same-sex couples. Led by Ambongo, they secured a rare opt-out from the Vatican.
A preview of Una caro published by Zenit stressed the African contribution to the DDF document’s development. Citing Vatican insiders, the Catholic news site said the collaboration showed “a growing maturity in the dialogue between the universal Church and the local Churches of Africa — whose vibrant faith and pastoral realism have increasingly shaped theological reflection in Rome.”
This is quite a turnaround from 2023.
What does the new document say?
In a foreword (“presentation”), doctrinal chief Cardinal Víctor Manuel Fernández stresses that the text is intended for the entire worldwide Church, despite differences in local situations.
He says the document has the positive purpose of drawing “from the Holy Scriptures, from the history of Christian thought, from philosophy, and even from poetry, reasons and motivations that encourage people to choose a unique and exclusive union of love.”
He hopes the diverse sources will form “a beautiful mosaic” that enriches readers’ understanding of monogamy. But if you’re in a hurry, he says, skip to the last chapter and the conclusion.
The brief first chapter (“introduction”) outlines the challenges to monogamy in both the developed and developing world. It says that Una caro seeks to enhance appreciation for monogamy, showing it is “not simply the opposite of polygamy,” but a concept with a much deeper meaning. It adds that the text is aimed primarily at bishops, but “may be of help to already married couples, engaged couples, and young people thinking of a future union.”
The second chapter considers how monogamy is presented in the Hebrew Bible, touching on Genesis, Chapter 2, the prophetic books, and Wisdom literature. It also explores nuptial symbolism in the New Testament.
The third chapter covers an immense amount of ground, examining reflections on monogamy over the past 2,000 years of Church history. Appropriately for a document approved by the Augustinian Pope Leo XIV, there are positive references to St. Augustine of Hippo, whose writings on marriage and sexuality are often criticized by contemporary thinkers.
The chapter skips from the Church Fathers to medieval writers, such as St. Bonaventure, and the 18th-century St. Alphonsus Liguori, and then to post-war Catholic theologians such as Hans Urs von Balthasar and Karl Rahner, and Eastern Orthodox thinkers. The text also zips through magisterial interventions, citing especially the popes from Leo XIII to Leo XIV.
The fourth chapter expands the reflection on monogamy to include broader philosophical and cultural insights. It roams eclectically from the thought of French Dominican Antonin Sertillanges to that of Danish existentialist Søren Kierkegaard. It dedicates a section to the reflections of Karol Wojtyła, the future Pope John Paul II, who developed the Theology of the Body. It dwells on the marriage of Jacques and Raïssa Maritain, a 20th-century French philosophical power couple.
Perhaps daringly, the chapter also explores monogamy in Indian philosophical and religious texts, implying that appreciation for the concept is also found beyond the Christian world.
The fifth chapter delves into poetry, starting with citations from Walt Whitman and Pablo Neruda — which might raise eyebrows given they are known for their erotic verses. Perhaps surprisingly, the chapter does not refer to William Shakespeare, though his Sonnet 116 is one of the most frequently recited at Western weddings.
The sixth chapter — the one that Cardinal Fernández suggests readers skip to — says that from the preceding philosophical, theological, and poetic reflections, two “decisive” concepts emerge, those of “mutual belonging” and “conjugal charity.”
Mutual belonging refers to a married man or woman’s free, firm, and exclusive choice to “belong” to their spouse. The text describes this as an enduring feature of a healthy marriage that survives “even when physical attraction and the possibility of sexual relations weaken.”
Conjugal charity points to the loving friendship at the heart of thriving marriages. The text highlights sexual relations as an expression of conjugal charity, underlining the need to “remain open to the communication of life,” as expressed in Pope Paul VI’s encyclical Humanae vitae. It also stresses the value of marriages that overflow with love, extending beyond the married couple and into a broader network of relationships.
The conclusion defines authentic marriage as “a unity composed of two individuals, requiring a relationship so intimate and all-encompassing that it cannot be shared with others.” It says that “unity and indissolubility” are two essential features of marital life. Finally, it stresses that a marital union is not something static but a reality that requires “a constant growth of love.”
What’s in the footnotes?
Una caro has 256 footnotes. The most frequently cited figure is Pope Francis, especially his 2016 post-synodal apostolic exhortation Amoris laetitia, on love in the family.
The next most common reference point is Pope John Paul II, notably his 1981 post-synodal apostolic exhortation Familiaris consortio.
The non-papal sources are extremely varied. Not surprisingly, there are ample citations of personalist philosophers, including Alice and Dietrich von Hildebrand, Emmanuel Mounier, Jean Lacroix, and Emmanuel Levinas. There are generous references to Eastern Orthodox writers such as Alexander Schmemann, Paul Evdokimov, John Meyendorff, and John Zizioulas.
Unusually for a Vatican doctrinal note, there are also quotes from a wide variety of poets, including America’s Emily Dickinson, Italy’s Eugenio Montale and Antonia Pozzi, France’s Paul Éluard, and India’s Rabindranath Tagore.
But arguably the most unexpected footnotes refer to Eastern non-Christian religious texts, including the Manusmṛti, an ancient Sanskrit legal document, the Srimad Bhagavatam, a Hindu religious text, and the Thirukkural, a classic Tamil book of aphorisms.
The longest footnote by far is the third, which takes issue with the argument that monogamy should be seen as an “exceptional fact” in Africa, given the widespread practice of polygamy. It argues that “many traditions in fact promote the monogamous model as the ideal of marriage that corresponds to divine plans,” while tolerating polygamy as a practical adaptation to harsh conditions.
It also highlights customs that suggest the first wife has an honored place in polygamous families, such as a special role in funeral rites and raising children born to other women.
The lengthy footnote drives home the point that monogamy isn’t simply a Western cultural quirk accidentally absorbed by Christianity — it’s built into the very nature of marriage itself.
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